Hell Freezes Over - in Michigan

By CNN News Wire

Published 01/09 2014 06:57AM

Updated 01/09 2014 07:03AM

HELL, Mich. -- What will you do now that hell has frozen over?   You know all those things you said you'd never do till hell freezes over? Well, it has.

Reporter:  "Is it a cold day in hell?"
"It's a damn cold day in Hell."

Hell, Michigan. Entering the gates of hell, who knew it could get down to 17 degrees below zero?

The hamlet of hell consists of a few businesses and a bar, as well as a website that urges would-be tourists to "go to hell." But now that hell's frozen over, it's a headline writers delight.  Some recent ones: "See you in hell, polar vortex 2014" "Hell has frozen over...Now what?"

"Just imagine how many things are getting done now. when hell freezes over I'll do this." says John Colone, the unofficial Mayor of Hell, Michigan

One of Colone's businesses sells hell souvenirs. So he's thrilled with all the attention. Like the cartoon says..."this winter there is a snowball's chance in hell."
"Truth be told, there are a lot of cold days in Hell. It freezes over regularly."

But this is extreme. When this hellian dug his way to his chicken coop, the eggs were frozen upon delivery.

As for the origin of hell's name, the unofficial mayor quotes the hamlet's first settler as saying..."Ah, call it hell for all I care. Everyone else does," says Colone.

These days it's the cold bedeviling the residents of hell, forcing them to bundle up in layers.

What is the underworld coming to when the forecast for hell is frigid.

"You are familiar with our university aren't you?" Colone asks a reporter.
"Damn U"

(Jeanne Moos, CNN)

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